Considering France is a country of fatty cheeses, early-age smoking, and painful high heels, French people are generally in amazing shape. They swear it’s because they don’t snack. I rather think it’s the result of just how socially unacceptable it is to be anything but beautiful on the Riviera. In any case, it’s as rare to see a pudgy local in these parts as it is to talk to a French adult (like their American counterparts) who believes in the redeeming quality of video games. Lovely, slim people every day give me that, “You write about what?” look.

Which is why it’s funny to me that the local train stations are just plastered with Wii Fit ads. These two–which come in a ladies’ version and a gentlemen’s version–were spotted in Antibes, and read roughly: “Bad posture messes with the balanced health of your body. Try this tray.” Convincing anyone, I wonder? Anyone else seen any other interesting international ads for the game?

Gosh darn it, teddy bears are meant to be hugged!

I know I’ve ranted about Build-a-Bearville before–the online world run by teddy bear retailer and my former employer, Build-a-Bear Workshop–but this time I don’t want to talk about the evil empire of fluff. Instead, I want to talk about the model behind the game: that is, the idea that there’s something interchangeable between a real-world toy and an online item. It’s strange.

Anyone who’s witnessed my giggle fits over various examples of adorableness can guess that I heart stuffed animals. One of the great things about them is their hug-ableness: how soft and squishy and comforting they feel. It seems to me that they’re actually defined by their physicality. There’s no one teddy bear game, or really even teddy bear make-believe. A teddy bear is an effective toy because it exists and can be held.

Virtual teddy bears, on the other hand, aren’t soft or squishy or even “real.” The idea of purchasing a real-life bear to access its online equivalent–which, by aforementioned bear nature, can’t really even exist–seems both so foreign. Who’s going to snuggle with a bear sprite? And who’s offline giving that already purchased bear the love and hugs it needs?

I’m off to hug a stuffed hippo and put some good teddy bear karma back in the world…

-Would it be really late 90’s if I shouted “Girl power!” here? The 2008 Women in Games Conference, held at the University of Warwick, is officially scheduled for September 10th-12th and calling for submissions. If you’ve got a paper–or a message–you’d like to present about females in the industry, go on and submit! I know I’m thinking about it…

-For months now I’ve been meaning to explore/post about this game called ELF Online, which bills itself as “the craziest MMORPG in history.” At the least, it’s surely one of the cutest ones. Newbies are greeted by “wet nurses,” the English is apparently horribly translated, and press releases claim the game attracts female players with its bizarre weapons, like a kitchen fruit knife. Ok, none of that equals adorable, but still: look!

-In masturbation news (okay, technology news), Second Life’s Linden Lab is apparently developing software that will allow players to circumvent their pain-in-the-butt user interface with hands-free, webcam-based motion sensing. That means more body parts available for… Well, you know what it means. Ah, progress.

Happy Weekend!

Sad face.

As of a few weeks ago, Scott officially headed back to the United States. His visa ran up after exactly six months here in the land of squishy cheese, so that means I have six more weeks of French-iness without my best friend/fiancé/partner in video-game writing crime. “But it’s the frickin’ Riviera,” you say. “Get over it!” Admittedly, the thing that’s helped the most–besides the sunshine and the friends and the men with baguettes–is my trusty webcam, which let’s me “see” my State-side beau on a daily basis.

The biggest problem there however is that, try as we might, we just can’t seem to make eye contact using webcams. That’s due to the annoying fact that I can either look at Scott’s image on my screen, or I can stare directly at the camera. In the first case, I get to see Scott but, to him, it seems like I’m looking away. In the second, it seems like I’m looking at him, but I’m actually not. One way or the other, it makes for some frustration when you can see someone, say sweet things to them, but can’t look in their eyes.

Scott’s suggestion: camera behind the screen. My suggestion: extend your non-professional visa for Americans, France!

I know it’s a million years away, but I’m excited to say that I’ll be officially participating this September at Arse Elektronika 2008, the awesome sex tech conference we talked about last week. Specifically, I’ll be presenting a topic in the “Narrative” track called “Princess Peach the Porn Star: Power in Erotic Video Game Fan Fiction.” Sound familiar, Heroine Sheik readers? Remember, the theme of this year’s conference is “Critical Perspectives on Sexuality and Pornography in Science and Social Fiction.” From my proposal:

Writing fan fiction is a popular—and often under-appreciated—way for video game enthusiasts to take an active role in their relationship to the medium they love. Frequently composed by younger fans, erotic stories dominate this genre. A survey of video game fan fiction published online shows that, at one time or another, players have used their own words to sexualize nearly every video game character ever created.

What we want to know is why so much video game fan fiction is erotic in nature. Is it because its authors want to see what happens after when their beloved characters ride off into the sunset, princesses on their arms? Or because they’re living out fantasies through the figures they admire and know best? Or is it simply because they have an unshakable case of sex on the brain?

With the help of author interviews and a number of erotic story close-readings, this presentation posits that the sexual nature of video game fan fiction is actually a question of power. Video games give players the chance to exert control over characters. This control is itself sexual—mimicking the power constructs of dominance and submission. When the player writes a piece of erotic fan fiction, he’s taken this control one step farther, manipulating the game to his sexual desires, reenacting his original interactive experience using the creative power of the fan fiction art form…

What do you say? Will I see you there?

This is supposed to be a post about Three Ring’s new online game, appropriately titled Whirled, which got officially announced at this February’s GDC. For the moment, I just can’t seem to get over this photo of Daniel James in his pirate gear. Why does that make me melt? I mean, I’ve interviewed Three Rings before without getting all flustered–Michael Bayne specifically, and for the release of Bang! Howdy. Hmm, I think I picked the wrong company head…

Right, news. So Whirled is an interesting little project executed with typical Three Rings aesthetics (that is to say, adorable ones). In theory, it combines user-generated content with mini games and fun social environments, all in a sort of compromise between developer and player. In effect though, Whirled isn’t quite as fun as its idea–at least not yet. There’s barely anyone around on the open beta, and the user-created mini games can often be hard to use. Plus the semi-3D social environments are, Club Penguin-style, fun to look at but awkward to navigate.

Players do, however, get to start their social lives in Whirled as a block of happy, dancing tofu who sings along to Beatles music. If that’s not worth the time to check the game out, I don’t know what is. Plus, the project’s early code name was Metasoy. As a vegetarian, I’m sensing a delicious pattern…