I’m really worried about sex advice, and it’s all Web 2.0’s fault. But before I get my online forehead in a furrow, I’ll explain.
Imagine this scenario: you’re concerned about oral sex. Sure, you could go to a friend and ask for advice, but that’s so potentially embarrassing. After all, that’s why the internet exists. So you type it into Google: cunnilingus. But–surprise surprise–instead of getting helpful tips on what to do when your husband wants to eat you out, you get porn. Endless, endless porn. What’s an awkward, orally-inexperienced girl to do?
That’s where ReallyWorried comes in, a new site and the subject of this week’s Click Me. It’s a place where troubled internet goers can share their woes and receive advice from online peers–people who’ll never know the identity of that woman who wanted to hear whether licking a woman’s clitoris wasn’t straight-up “gross.” It’s user-generated content meets a good cause. Great idea, right? Maybe not when the advice you receive is “Of course [cunnilingus] is gross. Have you tasted that stuff? The best thing you can do is make sure you’re clean and be grateful.”
There’s a reason why sex experts exist. Don’t believe it? Check out the site for yourself and try and give the web 2.0 thumbs up to the user who tries convinces a worried girlfriend that anal sex should hurt… a lot.
March 25th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
So the full title is “We will get you ReallyWorried.com”? That’s quite disappointing… And I see it’s not just about sex. Mmm… Clueless people being given advice by even more clueless people! Way to go :D
March 25th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
It’s true, it’s not just about sex. Sex just happens to be what I know well enough to know the advice is scary.
I think Rubin has a point, that people feel comforted by getting advice, but still…
March 25th, 2008 at 8:36 pm
This looks like a more high-tech version of “ask on 4chan,” but it seems to produce about the same results. Oh well. I guess at least it’s instructive to see the breadth of opinions even if it doesn’t directly help out.
I feel this way most keenly when I need to ask people for help with technical/computer things — what programming language to use for a given thing, what hardware setup is good for a desktop machine, and so on. The internet is full of experienced tech-heads and they all have these violently conflicting religious convictions about it. That seems to be a subject of particular contention, but you see it with everything around here.
March 25th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Not that I’ve used it much, but this sounds pretty much like an unrestricted Yahoo! Answers to me.
March 26th, 2008 at 3:09 am
It’s true, it’s a lot like Yahoo! Answers, with the difference that 1) there aren’t a million odd questions on there, so it’s not totally overwhelming and 2) the crowd is a lot older. On Yahoo! Answers, I’ve found the average age of people asking seems to be a whopping 16. At least on ReallyWorried we’ve got old British ladies :).
March 27th, 2008 at 10:13 am
I personally go to Dan Savage for all my sex advice needs… and anything beyond that, I am comfortable going to my friends, because if you can’t talk to your girlfriends about sex, then who can you talk to?
March 27th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
I’ve always been curious what percentage of his mail Dan Savage answers. Also, while I think he’s awesome in the overall, there have been a few questions he’s answered where I’ve been like “Uh, no!”–like cybersex is always cheating, and 24/7 BDSM relationships should stop when there’s family around. He’s great because he gives strong answers, but when he takes an all or nothing stance on something complicated, he sometimes overshoots his points…
March 30th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
another good site is http://midwestteensexshow.com/
it’s hilarious and the advice is really really good
April 1st, 2008 at 6:51 pm
I feel Scarleteen is a pretty good place to go…
FAQs and expert advice from people who are LGBT friendly, prochoice (as in, choice to have sex, keep the baby, get the abortion, etc.)
Hopefully, poor lost and scared will find that instead of….eurgh….this.
It’s amazing how much damage something like that can do to someone.
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:35 am
I’ll have to check Scarleteen out. I’ve never been. Have you had a bad experience yourself? It seems like maybe you have?
August 25th, 2008 at 10:09 am
She was hot but pretty stupid… I should have known better.