This one definitely gets filed under “bad Bonnie.”

So approximately a million years ago (i.e. about six months), I thought it would be a great idea to try a kitschy new kind of review called “the dating game review.” I was probably inspired by Jeremy Parish‘s fun and creatively themed reviews for 1up.com–though of course, like any good artist, if mine ever became popular I’d have to claim I’d never read his and then I’d have to feign insult that anything could have influenced my genius. Right.
Anyways, the dating game reviews were going to run weekly on Heroine Sheik. They probably would have covered smaller titles, like indie games or casual games. The idea was to do a campy combination of personals ads and video game criticism. To start out, I was going to review Popcap’s new (yeah, that shows you how long ago this was) title Peggle. In theory, the review was going to look something like this:

LOOKING FOR LOVE
Name: Peggle
Description: energetic, colorful, ballsy
Hobbies: amateur fireworks, collecting ball bearings, loves animals
Seeking: casual gamer with addictive personality for longterm relationship

Of course, it would have been longer than that–and hopefully more clever. Oh, and also more informative. Can you tell that this was all theory and no actual effort? Can you tell I needed to get the post out of my WordPress back end before it finally drove me insane? Reminds me of the “5 Questions” series that started (and ended) with Brad Abrams. In that one I even managed to insult friend and generally awesome person Brenda Brathwaite. Way to go, Bonnie! Ze Frank is definitely right on this one: it’s better to just do your cool projects and get them out there instead of sitting around thinking about doing them.