Wow, that sounds kind of sad.
Anyways, it is indeed my birthday. If you’re reading this, I’m off exercising my newly-acquired right to drink fluorescent cocktails and feed the slot gods with loose change. I’m really just in it for the flashing lights. And that great cha-ching noise they make, even when you lose.
At twenty-one, what do you get? Nothing particularly sexy. Porn comes at eighteen, but so does jury duty. And twenty-one… the ability to go at it while hammered?
Any particularly sex-tastic twenty-first stories out there? Me, I’m off to have a love affair with some cake.
July 1st, 2006 at 10:16 am
Here´s wishing you a delicious B-day
I don´t have any particularly sex-tastic twenty-first stories
at hand, but since twenty-one rhimes with fun
you may have one tomorrow about a lady and a cake :)
pK
July 1st, 2006 at 4:20 pm
Happy B-day, give yourself a present and describe your game design idea to me in an e-mail.
July 2nd, 2006 at 10:21 am
Happy Birthday! Alas, like many, I have no story to relate, since I was too busy sipping gin and tonics the night of my 21st. :(
July 2nd, 2006 at 10:42 pm
Lustig Geburtstag!
July 2nd, 2006 at 11:58 pm
Happy Birthday. I never did understand what significance 21 had, especially in a country where you can drink at 18. The only thing was the end of youth wages, so I had more money to spend on porn and alcohol.
July 4th, 2006 at 12:08 pm
you may have one tomorrow about a lady and a cake
Wow, that’s kind of disturbing :-).
Patrick, I am so on it. Really.
since I was too busy sipping gin and tonics the night of my 21st.
I’m a rum and coke kind of girl myself, but I feel you.
especially in a country where you can drink at 18.
Where in America can you drink at 18? Tell me and I will go. Though I guess there’s no reason now… I spent my day buying cheap wine and gambling at penny slots — and was never really carded. Where’s the drama? Where?
July 4th, 2006 at 2:23 pm
Cool! This means I can buy you a drink next time we run into each other out in meatspace.
July 4th, 2006 at 2:53 pm
heh.. had exactly the same feeling couple months ago.. still nice to be 21 :).. and I somewhat like that I could go to casino when I want :P.. (not that I’d want to)..
ok. hope you celebrated your bd well :P.. take care..
July 5th, 2006 at 12:06 pm
Cool! This means I can buy you a drink next time we run into each other out in meatspace.
“Meatspace.” I like that. I’ll have to use that ;).
Also, thanks to all for the “happy bdays”!
July 5th, 2006 at 3:50 pm
Sorry, i meant my country - Australia, where 21 has even less significance.
From “fluorescent cocktails” to rum and coke - your tastes vary quite a bit!
July 6th, 2006 at 1:12 pm
Happy B-Day! One day closer to middle age, one day closer to death.
I think once you are out of your parents house, birthdays no longer hold much meaning (at least for me).
My twenty-first was special for me because that was the year I finally had sex (with someone else that is). It was great, a romantic weekend camping trip, sat out under the stars, held hands … Sigh, I hope I can remember this stuff when I am 81.
July 6th, 2006 at 5:27 pm
From "fluorescent cocktails" to rum and coke - your tastes vary quite a bit!
I’m a complicated kind of girl. Mostly, I’ll take my alcohol where I can get it. Add sugar into the equation… mm mm mm.
My twenty-first was special for me because that was the year I finally had sex (with someone else that is).
I do wonder what the going age of de-virginization is these days. I have friends who, um, “lost it” as 14, and others who, to the best of my knowledge, still haven’t. What’s a standard, “descent” age, do you think?
July 6th, 2006 at 9:23 pm
Any point in legal adulthood - with another adult, of course.
July 7th, 2006 at 8:19 am
Any point in legal adulthood - with another adult, of course.
?
July 7th, 2006 at 11:13 am
“What's a standard, ‘descent’(sp) age, do you think?”
When you meet the right partner.
July 8th, 2006 at 8:00 am
When you meet the right partner.
People, people, such sappy answers. What age, if you heard someone had lost their virginity, would you think “eek” vs. “okay”?
July 8th, 2006 at 9:08 pm
Younger than 16. Seriously, I don’t care how “mature for their age” someone claims to be. Hands off until at least 16 yrs.
July 8th, 2006 at 9:08 pm
And how is “legal adulthood” a sappy answer?
July 9th, 2006 at 5:53 pm
Don’t you think the age difference is the key? 2 15 year olds vs a 15 and a 22 year old is a big difference. Also, experience. Being each others’ firsts makes for a naive, innocent and maybe bump and giggle nervous experience, whereas an experienced partner and a virgin could be helpful and sweet and reassuring, or manipulative and calculating. I dunno. Mutually consesual and not under false pretences are minimum standards I guess.
July 10th, 2006 at 11:20 am
Good point about the age gap. Yeah, two 15 yr olds going at it is unfortunate but not - at least to me - legally actionable unless there is coercion.
A 22 yr old and a 15 yr old is call-the-cops time. That’s predation, not seduction.
July 11th, 2006 at 8:21 am
“People, people, such sappy answers.”
My answer was not sappy so much as glib. :-)
Seriously, sex is such an intensely personal experience with so many factors involved that about the only hard rule I have is: “Before puberty is a big no-no.” Otherwise, how exactly do you draw an arbitrary line in the sand? In some parts of the world, the age of consent is 18; in others, it’s 16. How much do such laws reflect our understanding of human sexuality and how much do they just simply reflect social mores? Child brides may be quite common in some parts of the world, while they’re unheard of here - who’s doing things the “right” way?
I’m not saying I have no standards; I don’t embrace pure moral relativism here. [Child brides usually make me flinch, fer instance.] I’m just saying a lot depends on circumstances. E.g., BFA’s 15 & 22 year old scenario: the way you’ve pitched it, it sounds like you’re presuming the adult is the active party; but what if it’s the teenager who seduces the older partner? What if the adult didn’t know or ask how old the teenager is (or the teenager lied)? What if it’s the adult who’s the virgin and the teenager who’s the sexually experienced one?
“Not under false pretenses:” Dude, you just eliminated 85% of all sex that people have. Have you ever even been in a bar? ;-)
July 11th, 2006 at 9:26 am
Child brides may be quite common in some parts of the world, while they're unheard of here - who's doing things the "right" way?
We are. :)
July 11th, 2006 at 10:50 am
“But what if it's the teenager who seduces the older partner?”
A very good point, but then you have to go and bring in that whole deception angle. I’ve recently had my face re-burried in How I Learned to Drive, an excellent read/watch if we’re talking about age differences and cultural expectations. Personally, having only been on the teenage girl end of things, I want to know why a young female can’t knowingly and willingly go after an older man… without deception, just acceptance on both sides…?
July 11th, 2006 at 1:30 pm
“. . . bring in that whole deception angle.”
I only mention that as one possibility, but it seems like it would be a not unlikely scenario to me. Teenagers lie about who they are all the time; why not lie to older people to get them to sleep with you? Not like grownups don’t lie to each other all the time to get them to sleep with one another. :-)
“I want to know why a young female can't knowingly and willingly go after an older man"¦ without deception, just acceptance on both sides"¦?”
Well, for one thing, most men want to avoid statutory rape charges…
And if we as a culture frown on both teenage sexuality and female sexuality, how much do we disapprove of sexually active female teenagers actively pursuing older men? Pretty damn much, I’m thinkin’.
And it’s interesting you put it that way, Bonnie, because I quite consciously omitted mentioning any genders… :-)
July 12th, 2006 at 11:49 pm
Check out Hard Candy, a new (new in Australia anyways…) film on internet based sexual predator.
Also, remember the opening scene of at least one Buffy season, where a guy persuades a girl into a darkened ally/hallway, and the reversal is that the girl is the predator (vampire)? One of my favourite reversals of all time.
July 16th, 2006 at 8:26 am
And it's interesting you put it that way, Bonnie, because I quite consciously omitted mentioning any genders"¦
I, of course, have only been a under-aged girl, never an under-aged boy ;-). Plus, there are certain cultural paradigms, certain gender expectations, that not only reflect how we act, but sometimes influence it. The point being, I’m all ears for a story, even a hypothetical one, that switches things around. I’ve just yet to hear it.
Check out Hard Candy.
I will. Not available from Netflix yet, sadly (Netflix, how I love you)… but I will search the vast world of the internet. And it will be mine ;-).
Just as a general shout out to anyone/everyone following this thread, I really appreciate suggestons like this: movies and books especially that deal with paedophilia or masochism from an interesting angle. I’ll be working on a large project all this year, and I’m still putting together my reading list… Thanks!
July 16th, 2006 at 5:28 pm
I’m going to see a preview screening of “The Book of Revelation” tonight. It’s an Australian film of a Rupert Thomson book that focuses on a rape of a male by three females, and how the male fails to get back into a normal life afterwards. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0424863/
I’ll let you know how it was.
July 17th, 2006 at 6:51 pm
Well, it was disappointing as a film, and not very good as a study into the effects of being raped. I hope the book delved deeper into the emotional side of having to live a normal life after being raped, because the moping around by the lead in this film, followed by some interpretive dance, did nothing to communicate any inner turmoil.
The lead was abducted and raped by 3 women, who meant him no real harm, and pleasured him against his will, deriving their pleasure from his. The lead then tries to find these women, sleeping with many other women trying to track down the three, based on identifying tattoos and birthmarks. His motivation for revenge, or curiosity, or merely to sleep with them, is never properly explored.
The masochism angle is never really explored, as the characters emotionlessness throughout the film doesn’t allow the audience to gauge whether they are enjoying themselves, enjoying themselves against their will, or genuinely scarred by the experience. There is one reluctant woman rapist, but frustratingly, her story arc isn’t completed (along with several others - the jilted lover of the lead for example).
I have higher hopes for “Hard Candy”, which looks at a nice role reversal of a teen having power over her internet stalker.
July 18th, 2006 at 10:01 am
“Because the moping around by the lead in this film, followed by some interpretive dance, did nothing to communicate any inner turmoil.”
Eek, interpretive dance? Thank you, Player1, for taking a bullet for the team :-).
“I have higher hopes for "Hard Candy", which looks at a nice role reversal of a teen having power over her internet stalker.”
I’m all giddy just talking about it. Is it out in theaters there? DVD? I haven’t gotten too far stalking it down on the internet. Do tell when you see it!